Jundak
06-19-2008, 10:46 PM
Another good post...and one I can relate to (minus the boning):
Most noble and wonderful loot gods, your humble and devoted servant Delscorcho implores you.
I can’t say that I don’t get jealous when others pull khopeshes …
Wait! It is presumptuous of me to describe the hidden mysteries by which you endow your followers with loot. Rather than incorrectly describe the process by which you bestow your blessings as “the loot gods gave” or “I pulled” or “earned”, the correctness of each description being known only to you, mighty loot gods, I will instead only describe the item pulled as a verb. In that way, I may safely maintain you sacred mysteries.
Occasionally, I may become jealous when others are Khopeshed, while I am repeatedly hammered by you, oh mighty loot gods. I see others ringed with glorious loot, while I a mauled by your blessings. A lesser follower my curse you, oh supreme loot gods, and call you jerks, but not I. I merely find it amusing that I have been docented constantly without even using a warforged character. I will not question the motives of you, oh great loot gods.
Far be it for me, your humble follower, to question why others are cloaked in greatness while my own efforts are sadly unrewarded. Yet, I would ask for a boon related one small mission. Please loot gods, remember your servant Delscorcho, and please remember that he does not wish to be boned in the shroud anymore. In the last week, your servant has made seven trips into the shroud in an attempt to be thrice scaled, in order to complete his mighty mineral 2 dwarven ax . On Friday, you boned both my dwarf rangers. On Saturday, you boned my cleric and wizard. On Monday, you again boned one of my dwarven ranger and on Tuesday the other. Last night, you boned my sorcerer. Tonight, one dwarven ranger will make a trip to the shroud, and he is already fearful of what he may find in the chest.
Having been twice disappointed, this ranger is fearful that he will be treated like the protagonist of a Turkish Prison Movie, presumably one where the prisoner also receives unneeded shroud large ingredients. He is fearful of the long, shameful walk to the tavern and what other characters may say about him, when they discover what blessings he has received. Consider, oh loot gods, that this ranger merely wishes to be friends with thee, and would like some other blessing. His faith is shaken, and he suspects that your whole purpose for him is as a means for disposing unwanted large ingredients.
So, oh wonderful loot gods, please consider your devoted follower Delscorcho and please either 1) more equally spread your blessing to those who may actually need to be boned; or 2) consider recruiting a vender who may exchange unneeded ingredients for other similar ingredients on a 2:1 basis.
Most noble and wonderful loot gods, your humble and devoted servant Delscorcho implores you.
I can’t say that I don’t get jealous when others pull khopeshes …
Wait! It is presumptuous of me to describe the hidden mysteries by which you endow your followers with loot. Rather than incorrectly describe the process by which you bestow your blessings as “the loot gods gave” or “I pulled” or “earned”, the correctness of each description being known only to you, mighty loot gods, I will instead only describe the item pulled as a verb. In that way, I may safely maintain you sacred mysteries.
Occasionally, I may become jealous when others are Khopeshed, while I am repeatedly hammered by you, oh mighty loot gods. I see others ringed with glorious loot, while I a mauled by your blessings. A lesser follower my curse you, oh supreme loot gods, and call you jerks, but not I. I merely find it amusing that I have been docented constantly without even using a warforged character. I will not question the motives of you, oh great loot gods.
Far be it for me, your humble follower, to question why others are cloaked in greatness while my own efforts are sadly unrewarded. Yet, I would ask for a boon related one small mission. Please loot gods, remember your servant Delscorcho, and please remember that he does not wish to be boned in the shroud anymore. In the last week, your servant has made seven trips into the shroud in an attempt to be thrice scaled, in order to complete his mighty mineral 2 dwarven ax . On Friday, you boned both my dwarf rangers. On Saturday, you boned my cleric and wizard. On Monday, you again boned one of my dwarven ranger and on Tuesday the other. Last night, you boned my sorcerer. Tonight, one dwarven ranger will make a trip to the shroud, and he is already fearful of what he may find in the chest.
Having been twice disappointed, this ranger is fearful that he will be treated like the protagonist of a Turkish Prison Movie, presumably one where the prisoner also receives unneeded shroud large ingredients. He is fearful of the long, shameful walk to the tavern and what other characters may say about him, when they discover what blessings he has received. Consider, oh loot gods, that this ranger merely wishes to be friends with thee, and would like some other blessing. His faith is shaken, and he suspects that your whole purpose for him is as a means for disposing unwanted large ingredients.
So, oh wonderful loot gods, please consider your devoted follower Delscorcho and please either 1) more equally spread your blessing to those who may actually need to be boned; or 2) consider recruiting a vender who may exchange unneeded ingredients for other similar ingredients on a 2:1 basis.